As well as seeing and doing many wonderful things during our six months in Italy, we’ve also learned a bit about what it takes to make a good life here. While there have been no real surprises, it’s certainly true that we had underestimated the impact some things could have.

So in our efforts to become travellers rather than tourists in this always-fabulous, often-frustrating country, here are our top six learnings to date.

A Little Lingua Goes a Long Way
Everyone knows it’s important to try to use a few words of the local language; simple courtesy would encourage us to make an effort in this regard. But we’ve found that being able to communicate, in even basic Italian, makes a real difference in how we’re accepted. Most people are polite though ‘reserved’ at first, but when they hear us having a go in Italian, they relax and start to open up which is great. But then they assume our Italian is better than it actually is and start chatting away, asking questions, giving information, even doing jokes. So we launch into our ‘sorry, we speak only a little Italian and if you could go a bit slower it would really help‘ request and, to our surprise, people do! Italians are great communicators and if you’re up for a chat they’re more than happy to oblige. Of course, we still don’t understand everything that’s being said, but as time goes by, we seem to be getting the gist of more conversations and that’s making life a bit easier and a lot more fun.

Live Like a Local
It doesn’t take a lot of effort to not stand out in the crowd. As you know, how people behave and what they wear can shout ‘tourist’ from a hundred metres, and that’s before they’ve opened their mouths. Unfortunately obvious tourists are often attractive to pickpockets but to not many other locals. There’s certainly no need to ‘dress up’ every day here (which would be tough for us anyway with our limited clothing options), but there’s definitely no place for the hawaiian shirts and trackie dacks on the streets of Italy. And there’s no need to be first, fast or loud. Our approach generally is to step back and look around. (Unless we’re catching the bus, in which case ‘stepping back’ would leave us standing on the footpath waiting for the next one). And besides, there are real benefits to be had in respecting the local customs; afternoon siestas, pre-dinner aperitivi and evening passeggiate are some of the great joys of Italian life!

Make Time, Take Time
We’re very fortunate to have plenty of time to see and do things here. Occasionally, if we’re interested in something specific, we’ll book ourselves onto a guided tour. Recently, for example, we spent an afternoon walking through the Forum, Colosseum and Palatine Hill with a terrific young archaeologist. Luca had worked in the Forum as a student and done his thesis on an aspect of the work there. His knowledge and passion made it a wonderful experience for us. And we learned a lot! Most often, though, we just do a bit of research ourselves before we visit a site. Investing that time means we know what to look for when we get there, and even a small amount of information provides context and perspective. But we certainly don’t try to do it all; because a site is on someone else’s ‘must do’ list doesn’t mean we have to tick it off ours. Of course we enjoy visiting popular locations – they’re famous for a reason – but we also enjoy taking time in places that haven’t made it onto any list.

Be Open
One of the best things about our life in Italy has been the wonderful friends we’ve made along the way. While it’s not hard to make friends here, you do have to be open to it. And you have to be proactive. When we first arrived and were searching for ways to extend our language skills, we came up with a concept we called ‘Coffee and Conversation.’ The idea was to find people willing to spend an hour or two listening to our bad Italian, in exchange for coffee and pastries and the chance for them to practise their English on us. It worked and the members of our small ‘Coffee and Conversation’ group ended up becoming lovely friends. Our experience has been that if visitors are willing to take the first step, they’ll find most Italians to be warm, generous and very welcoming.

Stay Connected
Good wifi makes the world go round. Literally. The value of a high-speed, high-quality internet connection can’t be overstated. It’s important for every day life (What time does the show start? What’s the word for antibiotic in Italian? And often, okay Google maps how do we get out of here?) and it’s also essential for staying in touch with family and friends. We have local SIM cards in our phones, too, so it’s easy to make calls and for people to contact us. And the bonus is that Italians take you more seriously when you have a local phone number.

It’s Italy!
Of course life is not without its frustrations. Whether you’re a driver or a pedestrian, the traffic here is crazy. Stop signs, lane markings and no parking signs are suggestions only. Parking on pedestrian crossings is often essential and being parked in while someone is off running a few errands is just one of those things. And the paperwork is extraordinary; everything is done in duplicate or triplicate. The cash register docket is often not enough; you wait while the shop owner handwrites a receipt (but only after they’ve moved the two carbon sheets to the right place in the receipt book). And don’t get us started on the process of sending a package via the Post Office (suffice to say we allow a good hour for what in Australia would take less than five minutes). Last week, we opened an Italian bank account. The customer service person was terrific, and the process began on her computer. Great, we thought! But the celebration proved to be premature. The computer was just an opening move. An hour and a half, 80 printed pages and 12 signatures later (a duplicate set for each of us because the account is in joint names, and another copy for the bank) and we were done. Of course these little frustrations are just part of life here and nothing can change that. So now when we come across something that we’d once have found annoying, we just smile, shrug and remind each other that ‘It’s Italy.’ And it seems it’s not only us. Recently as one of our Italian friends was describing something frustrating that had happened, the others turned to her and said simply ‘E’ Italia!’ It’s Italy … like it or not. And we do. We most definitely do.